Monthly List
Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” album
celebrates its 25th anniversary this
year. It’s the best-selling album in
history, with current sales topping 104
million copies. And still going!
What’s the best way to celebrate this
feat, the man, and his music?
The Top 9 Ways to Commemorate
the 25th Anniversary of “Thriller”
9> A box of bandages, a case of Jesus Juice, and 104 naked five-year-old boys.
8> Find a way to buy your way out of spending the next 25 in the clink for pedophilia.
7> Nothing says “congrats on the great album” like a herd of theatre geeks dressed like zombies dancing to “Thriller” in a mall hallway.
6> Marvel at how good Michael’s zombie makeup is, 25 years later.
5> Chug a Pepsi and light your Jheri curl aflame, Holmes!
4> Call up Paul McCartney, see if he wants to duet on “The Girl is *Yours*”
3> I keep seeing those hastily-constructed carnivals in mall parking lots. Why not my front yard?
2> Do things that mimic the experience of listening to Thriller, such as getting a prostate exam with a rhinestone glove.
and the Number 1 Way to Commemorate the 25th Anniversary of “Thriller”…
1> Share with the world your love of flowers, children and killer whales, then get a mind-blowing handjob from Macaulay Culkin
Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” album
celebrates its 25th anniversary this
year. It’s the best-selling album in
history, with current sales topping 104
million copies. And still going!
What’s the best way to celebrate this
feat, the man, and his music?
The Top 9 Ways to Commemorate
the 25th Anniversary of “Thriller”
9> A box of bandages, a case of Jesus Juice, and 104 naked five-year-old boys.
8> Find a way to buy your way out of spending the next 25 in the clink for pedophilia.
7> Nothing says “congrats on the great album” like a herd of theatre geeks dressed like zombies dancing to “Thriller” in a mall hallway.
6> Marvel at how good Michael’s zombie makeup is, 25 years later.
5> Chug a Pepsi and light your Jheri curl aflame, Holmes!
4> Call up Paul McCartney, see if he wants to duet on “The Girl is *Yours*”
3> I keep seeing those hastily-constructed carnivals in mall parking lots. Why not my front yard?
2> Do things that mimic the experience of listening to Thriller, such as getting a prostate exam with a rhinestone glove.
and the Number 1 Way to Commemorate the 25th Anniversary of “Thriller”…
1> Share with the world your love of flowers, children and killer whales, then get a mind-blowing handjob from Macaulay Culkin